


Without Hesitation

by sturms_sun_shattered



Series: Rito Chronicles [10]
Category: The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Gen, One-Sided Attraction, Unrequited
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-07
Updated: 2020-08-07
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:47:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25771606
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sturms_sun_shattered/pseuds/sturms_sun_shattered
Summary: Guy frets over Gesane and the feelings he can't seem to bury.Runs concurrently withFor Ages to Come15 & 16.
Series: Rito Chronicles [10]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1757296
Comments: 4
Kudos: 7





	Without Hesitation

**Author's Note:**

  * For [wokeboke](https://archiveofourown.org/users/wokeboke/gifts).



The sun was setting and the curtains of Gesane’s roost remained drawn. From where he sat fletching arrows at the back of Gesane’s tiny roost, Guy could see Gesane shifting uncomfortably in his hammock. Gesane had been restless most of the day, unable to sleep for more than a few minutes time. Just before first light, Guy had returned from where he had stood guard at the stable for most of the night and Mazli had told him that Gesane had been unsettled for much of the night as well.

“My leg feels like its on fire,” Gesane said listlessly.

Gesane was not usually given to complaining, so Guy set down his arrow and knife and rose to check the wound from the bokoblin. Gesane sucked in his breath and pulled away a little as Guy unwound the bandage on his thigh and carefully brushed back his feathers to examine the wound.

“It’s a little swollen, but it’s not festering,” said Guy as he splashed some spirits onto a clean cloth to disinfect it.

Gesane clenched his beak and tensed, but said nothing as he bore the sting of the spirits. He remained quiet as Guy wrapped the wound in a clean bandage and collected the blanket that had slid to the floor.

“Do you want to let some air in?” Guy asked gesturing to the fastened curtain.

Gesane shook his head and winced at the motion. He had always been private, Guy thought, but his public humiliation threatened to make him a recluse. Guy could hardly blame him for not wanting anyone to see him in such a state. He imagined Gesane would have banished him from his roost as well had he the strength to move from his hammock.

“I think the fever is setting in,” Gesane said.

Guy put a hand to Gesane’s forehead, digging beneath the feathers to feel the skin beneath.

“You’re very warm,” Guy confirmed as he smoothed back the feathers he had mussed.

“I can’t believe that bastard bit me.”

“I’m sorry.”

“You couldn’t have done anything. It was my own inattention that caused this...I only hope I don’t pay with my life...”

“You won’t,” said Guy, still stroking his brow, “I won’t let it happen.”

“I don’t imagine you have much say in the matter.”

“We’ll see.”

“Well, if you wish to fight the Goddess for me...”

“I think you know that I would.”

Gesane didn’t say anything to that, though he shifted slightly from Guy’s comforting touch and Guy withdrew. It had been too many years since Guy had dared say such things—he knew Gesane had never wanted to hear them.

“I think I’ll try to sleep,” Gesane said at last, “maybe now that the sun’s going down...”

“I’ll be here,” said Guy as he settled back into his own hammock on the other side of the room and tried not to think of his many sins.

oOo

Guy had not realized that he had drifted off until he was awakened by Gesane’s screech. He nearly tripped over his discarded arrows as he stumbled through the pitch-dark roost to Gesane’s side.

“What’s wrong?” Guy asked as Gesane clutched at his wings and clothes in a panic, his hammock swinging wildly.

“I don’t want to fall!”

“What?”

Guy turned as he heard the _swoosh_ of the curtain at the door being drawn aside.

“Mazli?”

“We were coming back from our watch,” said Mazli as he and Laissa pushed into the darkened roost.

“Why are there so many people in here?” Gesane gasped, still grasping at Guy’s clothes.

“It’s alright,” said Guy as he reached out a hand to Gesane’s face, “it’s Mazli and Laissa. They want to know that you’re alright.”

“I need...solid ground.”

“Mazli,” Guy gestured the other warrior over as Laissa lit the lanterns.

Gesane was in such a panic that he didn’t even protest to Mazli taking one wing as they helped him to the floor of the roost. Guy slipped a cushion beneath Gesane’s head as he lay flat on the rug, still panting from the nightmare.

“He’s burning up.” Mazli whispered to Guy as he held one of Gesane’s shaking wings.

“Everyone...stop...touching me,” Gesane pleaded through his hitching breaths.

Mazli let go of Gesane’s wing and he clenched them both to his chest.

“I’m going to fetch Saki,” said Laissa as she pushed aside the curtain and left the roost.

“Gesane, just talk to us,” said Guy, trying to gauge how lucid Gesane was.

“I want Ariane,” he gasped, his glassy eyes staring through Guy, “please.”

Guy tried to ignore the sting in the plea. Gesane had always thought himself incapable of having such feelings for another—that was what he had told Guy—but Ariane had somehow broken through where Guy never could.

“You ended things,” Guy said softly.

As soon as he said it he realized it had been the wrong thing to say. Gesane fell apart, weeping and cursing Kaneli and Nekk, Huck and Misa, and even Teba. Mostly he cursed his wings, his hands clenched into fists as swore and choked.

Mazli looked as though he, too, was about to cry as he witnessed Gesane’s misery. Guy tried to calm Gesane with his words, still afraid that he might lash out if he touched him.

“You’re alright, we’re here for you,” he told him, his wing hovering near Gesane’s shoulder.

“Fuck you, Guy,” Gesane wept, “you weren’t here when they did this to me!”

“I know, I’m sorry. I’m here now.”

Gesane clenched a fistful of his shortened feathers as he sobbed.

“Why don’t they grow back?” he wept.

Guy knew what was going to happen only a moment too late. With a quick yank, Gesane tore the feathers from his wing.

“Gesane, don’t!” cried Mazli, reaching in to intervene.

“Don’t do that,” Guy said at the same time, catching Gesane’s bloody wing, “you’re hurting yourself.”

“Just leave me be!”

“Where the hell is Saki?” Mazli nearly shouted as held Gesane’s wing.

“Mazli, don’t hurt him more,” Guy said as Gesane tried to pull away.

Mazli reluctantly let go and Gesane reached out and grasped Guy’s wing. Guy flinched, worried for a moment that Gesane meant to take a handful of feathers from him as well. Instead, he pulled Guy toward him and pressed his beak to the back of Guy’s wing.

“The floor hurts,” he whispered, “everything hurts.”

“Alright,” said Guy, his stomach in knots at Gesane’s tearful admission, “I’ll try to help.”

He glanced at the arrows which were still strewn about the floor.

“Mazli, could you...?”

Mazli nodded and tidied away the arrows. 

Guy pulled Gesane up to rest his back against him and settled against the half-wall of the roost. He held Gesane’s wings, worried he might lash out again and Gesane rested his head back on Guy’s shoulder, his burning forehead pressed against Guy’s neck. Gesane seemed quiet for the moment, though the whiffling echoes of sobs still wracked his body occasionally.

“Is this any better?” Guy asked him.

Gesane nodded but kept his eyes squeezed shut. Guy glanced up at Mazli who stared at them with a curious expression.

“What?”

“This isn’t the first time you’ve done this for him,” Mazli realized aloud.

“No,” said Guy tersely, “can you stop the bleeding on his wing?”

Mazli nodded and found a linen bandage in the supplies Saki had dropped off during the day. As he held the cloth against Gesane’s wing, Guy noticed Mazli’s eyes lingering on Gesane’s hand in his.

“What happened with you two?” Mazli asked quietly.

“What is he asking?” Gesane rasped.

“He’s not asking anything,” Guy told Gesane and shook his head as subtly he could with Gesane’s feverish face pressed to his neck.

Saki entered the roost, sparing Guy the need to answer any further questions from Mazli. Before Mazli and Laissa left, Mazli held Gesane’s wing and told him that he wanted him to get well with a sincerity Guy had rarely heard from the younger warrior. Guy had thought it was kind, though Gesane responded with what might have been a scoff.

oOo

Guy knew that he was best known for his amicability. He was easy-going, the other Rito would say, though he thought perhaps he was just passive. Guy could not claim to have any ill-will from other the Rito—except perhaps Ce, but he was trying his best to to think of the mess he had made with his wife right now. Guy was good at the game of getting on with others, of not saying things that made people want to crack his beak or put an arrow in his wing. As such, the rest of the village tended to assume that Guy liked everyone.

But Guy didn’t like Harth. He didn’t trust Harth. The warrior-turned-bow-maker had been volatile as long as he had known him, and Guy could not even claim to trust him in battle. When Saki called Verla from the boardwalk to go fetch Harth, Guy wanted to protest, but he was growing exhausted as he restrained Gesane’s wings and he could no longer turn down help from others. 

Gesane had grown more emotional and confused with the spike in his fever, and Guy had failed to stop him tearing out even more feathers as he begged for Ariane.

“Harth’s gone to get her,” Guy reassured him as he struggled, “just let Saki help you.”

Guy tried to ignore the hurt he felt as Gesane had begged for his Hylian love. It wasn’t right to be jealous after so long, Guy knew. After all, he had had others as well—he even thought he could have grown to care for some of them. 

Now wasn’t the time for these thoughts anyway, Guy admonished himself as Gesane dropped his head back on his shoulder and Saki pressed a cool cloth over his eyes. Right now, Gesane needed to make it through the night and Guy was determined to get him through to morning. Whether Gesane had fallen asleep or merely lost the will to fight, Guy could not tell. As Gesane’s strength left him, Guy let his friend’s wings rest gently in his lap. 

When Ariane and Harth arrived, Guy had to fight to keep his expression neutral. Ariane was only here to help, he reminded himself, this wasn’t her fault...even if she was the only person who had ever tempted Gesane away from— _no_. Guy refused to blame her, even in his darkest thoughts; he wasn’t that person.

Ariane knelt by Gesane, hesitant to touch him in case she woke him. Guy kept still and silent for the same reason as he tried to catch Harth and Saki’s whispered conversation on the other side of the small roost.

After their discussion, Saki left the roost and Guy wished she had stayed; he didn’t want to be left with no buffer against Harth. No matter how much Gesane claimed that Harth had changed for the better, Guy had not yet seen any proof of this monumental transformation.

As Gesane shifted uncomfortably, the cloth slipped from his face and rolled off Guy’s wing to the floor. Ariane caught it and returned it to the bowl.

“Ariane,” breathed Gesane.

“I’m here, don’t worry,” she said firmly as Gesane leaned forward into her arms.

Guy was conflicted as he pulled himself from behind Gesane and straightened his stiff body. Ariane brushed away his tears as he wept—for what, Guy imagined even Gesane was not longer certain—and rested his head in her lap when his strength failed him. As she cooled his brow and wiped at his tears, Guy begrudgingly felt he might understand something of what Gesane saw in her.

“Saki left some herbs that may help him,” Harth told Guy, “can you keep Ariane safe?”

“I think I can manage it,” said Guy, still trying to walk off the cramping in his legs.

Harth left the roost and Gesane drifted off once more. Guy was sweeping up the feathers that Gesane had torn from his wings when Ariane hissed his name sharply.

“ _Guy!_ ”

“What?” Guy whispered.

She motioned him over with a jerk of her hand, a line forming between her reddish eyebrows.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” she hissed.

“Say anything?”

“You were at the stable last night! Why didn’t you tell me?”

Guy hesitated for a moment. He had thought about it for a moment at the time, but he hadn’t been certain that Gesane would want to see her when he was so dizzy with blood loss.

“Guy, I know what you mean to him,” she said, “he worried while you were away, refused to give you up for dead as everyone else had.”

Guy was surprised to hear this; he knew that Gesane had been mired in his own problems since his return, but he didn’t realize how much his absence must have weighed on him.

“I don’t know why I didn’t tell you” said Guy, “I knew you had ended your...association. I didn’t want to complicate things for either of you.”

It wasn’t precisely a lie. He wasn’t sure there was a truth worth telling.

“You don’t have to worry about my feelings, I’m hardly fragile,” Ariane told Guy, “I just...if anything ever happened...”

“In the future, I’ll remember that.”

Gesane shuddered and whimper escaped him. Guy reached for his hand as Ariane dampened the cloth to cool his face.

“Guy,” he whispered.

“I’m right here,” he said, surprised that Gesane had called for him instead of Ariane.

“It hurts to lie on the floor.”

“Do you want your hammock?”

Gesane shook his head almost imperceptibly and clutched Guy’s hand a little harder. He didn’t want to say it, Guy realized, but Gesane had always had trouble asking for what he wanted. In less grave circumstances Guy would have almost found it funny.

“Do you want me to hold you?” Guy asked softly.

Gesane nodded, and Guy wasn’t sure if the pain in his expression was from the discomfort of lying on the floor or the embarrassment of having his needs vocalized. Guy pulled Gesane close once more and sat back against a cushion as Gesane slumped against him.

“Try to sleep,” Ariane told Gesane as she rested the cloth over his face, “everyone’s here for you.”

As Guy held Gesane’s shaking wings in his, he recognized it was completely unreasonable for him to bear a grudge against Ariane when it was clear the only thing she had ever done was love Gesane. Guy desperately wanted to be reasonable.

oOo

The next few days and nights went on very much the same—when Gesane’s fever would break he attempted to be rational with his friends, apologized for the little indignities he seemed to remember, tried not to complain about the pain. When his fever would return his muscles spasmed, he wept, he needed to be held. Sometimes he slept with his head in Ariane’s lap or curled up on the floor with her arms around him, sometimes Harth held him, mostly he seemed to want Guy.

Guy tried not to read into this—surely it was just some coincidence of their heights that made Guy the perfect person to lean against, or perhaps it was their long history of willing each other through the trials of warriorhood, or maybe Guy was simply better at sitting still while Gesane’s weight pressed against him. In any case, Guy had barely slept more than as few hours over the past few days as he tried to will Gesane through the dark nights.

Gesane was at his very worst the evening after the ousting. The tiny bit of activity he had stubbornly performed seemed to have drained all the strength from him. After the hectic days and nights since Gesane’s injury, Guy, Harth and Ariane were exhausted as well. By nightfall, Ariane slept in Gesane’s hammock, Harth had left before sunset and hadn’t yet returned, and Gesane seemed to melt back against Guy as he shifted uncomfortably and wept in his sleep.

“I’m still here,” Guy assured him as he re-damped the cloth and held it to Gesane’s face.

“I can’t fight anymore,” Gesane whispered hoarsely, his trembling hands resting on the wing Guy had wrapped around his chest.

“Yes you can,” said Guy, “if you don’t fight, I’ll fight on your behalf.”

“I’m so tired.”

“Then close your eyes, I’m not going anywhere.”

“I want this to be— _ah_...” 

Gesane’s muscles tightened and he couldn’t quite hold back a small shriek of pain as he doubled over. His hands dug into Guy’s wing and Guy could only hold him and rest a comforting wing on his back. It was getting difficult to hide how helpless he felt in the face of Gesane’s agony.

“I know, I know, just breathe,” Guy told him as he had countless times before, his voice catching as he pressed his forehead to the back of Gesane’s neck, “you’re nearly through it.”

By the time Harth arrived back, Guy was quietly weeping into Gesane’s shoulder as he held him. The fatigue of the last few days had finally caught up with him, and the only thing he could think to do was to keep holding Gesane.

“Ariane,” called Harth as he crouched in front of Gesane and laid a wing on his chest, perhaps worried that Gesane had succumbed.

“He’s alright,” Guy said.

“Are _you_?” Harth asked.

Guy nodded though he could still feel his tears on his feathers.

“Let Ariane take over for a bit,” said Harth as he helped Ariane settle Gesane.

Without Gesane to occupy his wings, Guy reached out to hold his friend's hand.

“Guy, let’s have some air,” Harth suggested firmly, one hand on Guy’s shoulder to steer him out to the boardwalk.

“I’m fine,” said Guy as soon as they stepped out into the cool autumn night.

“You’ve been doing to much.”

“I don’t want to leave him alone.”

“He’s not alone.”

“Fine. I don’t want to leave him alone _with you_.”

“What?” Harth looked far more confused than insulted.

“I don’t know why you’re here,” said Guy, “when I’ve only ever known you to scoff at the pain of others.”

“I’m confident you are one of the very few people I haven’t hurt,” said Harth in surprise.

“Perhaps it’s only a small thing—you likely don’t even remember,” Guy told him angrily, “but I cried when I was initiated as a novice. And you laughed...it felt unbearably cruel at the time.”

“I don’t remember, but that does sound...accurate,” said Harth, an unexpected note of shame in his voice, “and I’m sorry for it.”

Guy was momentarily stunned into silence. He finally responded to Harth’s apology with a little noise of derision.

“I had no right,” Harth told him, “I didn’t cry on the field when I was first blooded, but I did when I returned home. I’m ashamed of the things I did in my youth, and I’ve been trying to make amends.”

“Good. Fine,” stammered Guy.

“I think you need to rest.”

“Don’t tell me what I need.”

“Then listen to yourself! You’re shaking, you’re falling apart, you can’t even stand up straight. I know you want to help Gesane, but you can’t help him like this. You need to rest.”

“What you say sounds so reasonable,” said Guy darkly, “but you’re saying it in Harth’s voice so my mind refuses to accept it as such.”

Harth’s expression was strangely impassive.

“Guy, go lie down in your hammock. I won’t leave Gesane alone and neither will Ariane.”

Guy acquiesced, the heaviness of his body finally forcing him to reconsider his stubbornness. He returned to the roost and knelt beside Gesane for a moment where he slept restlessly beside Ariane.

“Wake me if anything happens,” Guy told her as he smoothed the ruffled feathers on Gesane’s chest.

“Of course.”

Guy lay back in his hammock and fell asleep to the sound of Harth and Ariane’s whispered voices.

oOo

Guy awoke with a start, confused to see the curtains open and the sky purple with dusk. He sat up and looked around the roost. Ariane and Harth had left and Gesane was resting peacefully in his hammock, his damaged wings folded across his body. 

Guy slid from his hammock and crossed the roost to Gesane. Evidently, he had not been sleeping very deeply and stirred as he heard Guy approach.

“Guy.”

“Are you feeling better?” Guy asked. 

He resisted the urge to reach out and stroke Gesane’s face as he had so many times over the past few days.

“I’m just tired,” Gesane said, “you slept all day, too.”

“But you’re well?” Guy pressed.

“I’m well.”

Guy nodded.

“Since Teba has lifted the restrictions that forced us into secrecy, I plan to...carry on with Ariane,” said Gesane after a long break.

“I’m happy for you,” said Guy, and he really wanted to be. Perhaps one day he would be.

“She may stay here sometimes—I don’t think she’s ready for anything so permanent as marriage—but I want you to know that you can stay here as well...until you work things out with Ce.”

“I don’t want to impose—”

“You’ve already imposed. You may as well stay.”

“I’m grateful,” said Guy and he meant it.

“Guy,” Gesane said as he reached out to take his wing, “I know what you did for me...I don’t know that I could have endured this without you.”

“You’d have been alright,” Guy told him, folding Gesane’s hand in both of his.

“You don’t need to humour me. I’ve never known such agony...nor such...” Gesane paused and stared meaningfully at Guy, “care.”

“You’d have done the same for me.”

Gesane reached up to wrap his wing around the back of Guy’s neck in a gesture of affection they had not shared in years. His gaze remained resolute as he spoke.

“Without hesitation.”

**Author's Note:**

> Dear wokeboke,
> 
> I’m making you search for the background info before I just give it away. Thanks for your trust in me and I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it ♥
> 
> -Sun


End file.
